We are like puppets with strings attached to our jobs.
My husband and I can go on for a month without stepping our feet into the outside world except when we have to take our son to school early in the morning and fetch him a few hours after.
The seasons change without us even noticing. The rain splatters noisily on our roofs. The sun shines outside our glass windows. The moon wanes and waxes, completely disappears in the darkness and appears again in full grandeur. But we never take a glimpse. The stars continue to shine above us while we restlessly type on our keyboards and stare on our computer screens.
There’s just too much to be done. And there’s not a day that we aren’t exhausted.
We had a conversation the other night about how our family life is going, and we realized that while we have more than enough to have a comfortable life, there is something missing. It struck us how we have turned ourselves into mere money-making machines. Between work and parenting, we have lost something precious along the way: our sense of purpose, of meaning, of wonderment. Every day has turned into just going through or a matter of surviving.
We don’t have a community to share life with, and that has put all the world on our shoulders. It gets unbearable sometimes. We can only be islands for so long.
We don’t know yet where to go from here, but we do know what we need to: find our way back home. I and my husband seem to agree on the philosophy/way of life we want to live: nature-centered. The transition from our current life to this dream life isn’t going to be easy, but we have to start somewhere.
There’s also one magickal practice I am very interested in, but I have to keep it out of this post. I’m excited but equally terrified.
May the Energies of the Universe guide us on this journey.